Ode to Loss (an EOL Eulogy)
Posted: 09 Sep 2012, 00:47When the vision of the horizon nearing came, I thought I knew what the future would Be. Today the paths come to a close, my brothers, as inevitability rears its ugly head for the final time.
You, O Performa 6360, won the battle with the dreaded X11, and YDL 2.1 ran just fine. And when your late brother, that 5250, vacated its housing for your mother board, you fought on - despite X11 having no clue how to draw graphics on that built-in 15" screen. You, O Gossamer, oh nimble creature that sped through OS 9.2.2, flaunted X.1.5, and bragged YDL 3.0.1, it was with you I traveled the 99 Seas. With that 12" PCI board, you pacified the barbarians' vice for words. You, O Titanium PowerBook, who made Panthers eat 4 Dogs' dust, who survived collegiate use (and afterhours abuse)... upon your keyboard did I code that undergraduate thesis. And You, O G5 Quad, whose four cores were pulled by 6.2 huskies; you rendered the graduate project too fast for real-time, and shamed your OEM's multimedia suite!
The 7500! The 9600/300! The Xserve Dual G5! Oh! How won'drous the Power! Oh, how my Yellow Dog mauled that Red Hat!...
But I speak as if to the dead - the Apple fell far from its tree, old Yellow put down, and now the last living veteran to have Fought the Good Fight... alas! your symptoms decyphered as hyperthermia. None of the liquid coolant in all of Neptune shall wash my tears as I take you on your final voyage to the curb.
Yes, we compiled the good code; yes, we debugged the bad code. It has been a decade's distance with ten years worth of PowerPC Linux binaries run. But the inevitable comes, and as you cross the pearly gates marked "End-of-Life", speak well of me to your forebearers.
...and may whichever Steve we believe in have mercy upon our bleak computing future.
You, O Performa 6360, won the battle with the dreaded X11, and YDL 2.1 ran just fine. And when your late brother, that 5250, vacated its housing for your mother board, you fought on - despite X11 having no clue how to draw graphics on that built-in 15" screen. You, O Gossamer, oh nimble creature that sped through OS 9.2.2, flaunted X.1.5, and bragged YDL 3.0.1, it was with you I traveled the 99 Seas. With that 12" PCI board, you pacified the barbarians' vice for words. You, O Titanium PowerBook, who made Panthers eat 4 Dogs' dust, who survived collegiate use (and afterhours abuse)... upon your keyboard did I code that undergraduate thesis. And You, O G5 Quad, whose four cores were pulled by 6.2 huskies; you rendered the graduate project too fast for real-time, and shamed your OEM's multimedia suite!
The 7500! The 9600/300! The Xserve Dual G5! Oh! How won'drous the Power! Oh, how my Yellow Dog mauled that Red Hat!...
But I speak as if to the dead - the Apple fell far from its tree, old Yellow put down, and now the last living veteran to have Fought the Good Fight... alas! your symptoms decyphered as hyperthermia. None of the liquid coolant in all of Neptune shall wash my tears as I take you on your final voyage to the curb.
Yes, we compiled the good code; yes, we debugged the bad code. It has been a decade's distance with ten years worth of PowerPC Linux binaries run. But the inevitable comes, and as you cross the pearly gates marked "End-of-Life", speak well of me to your forebearers.
...and may whichever Steve we believe in have mercy upon our bleak computing future.
